The 100th anniversary of Titanic’s fateful voyage arrives laden with new photos, new articles and, of course, new theories regarding what caused her sundering. Over the past century, researchers, authors and filmmakers have blamed the incident on everyone from White Star management and Belfast’s Harland and Wolff shipyard to Captain E. J. Smith and helmsman Robert Hitchins.
In this article, I examine the latest and arguably most novel theory: The moon did it.
Like international waters, space is a commons usable by all but owned by none; but, unlike any earthly commons, space borders every country on the planet, and actual or metaphorical fallout from an incident there could spoil days — or destroy lives — anywhere on Earth.
So, who watches the spacemen? And what laws or treaties exist to protect us all? The answers might surprise you.
History is so replete with property swindles that we still have jokes about them. The phrase, “if you believe that, then I’ve got a bridge to sell you” derives from a favorite dodge of turn-of-the-century confidence men like George C. Parker, who sold the Brooklyn Bridge multiple times — along with the Metropolitan Museum of Art, the Statue of Liberty and Grant’s Tomb. Selling Florida swamp land, a favorite scam of the early 20th century, continues to this day.
Scan the internet, and you’ll quickly find a half-dozen companies ready to sell you your very own piece of space property, starting with the moon. In this article, I ask whether anyone can actually own our nearest neighbor, or if all these companies are exchanging for your green is a load of green cheese.
The Large Hadron Collider isn’t going to spawn one, and our own sun will never become one, but it’s fun to think about what might happen if a black hole lurked its way into our cosmic neighborhood. It’s the cosmological equivalent of a ghost story, pitting our bite-sized planet against the reality-bending might of the ultimate bogeyman.
So, what would happen? Let’s just say that, if you’ve ever wondered how taffy feels, you’re about to gain some insight. Still, you might be surprised at some of the crazy ways the scenario plays out—and at the mind-blowing experiences you would have if you could survive the trip.
So, you’re looking for a scenic spot in the solar system to set up Lagrange Acres, your space trailer park, but you can’t abide the planet-side property taxes. Space is nice enough, but who can afford the fuel necessary to stay in a stable orbit? If only there were some place to park where you wouldn’t be whipped around by gravitational fields like a tether ball, you’d be in business. The question is, where?
Well, friend, I’m here to help. See, in space, as on Earth, the real estate mantra remains the same: location, location, location.